Post by wildchild on Apr 24, 2017 2:45:43 GMT
“You don't have to thank me, I was just doing my job.”
Leona Pantera licked her red lips while she waited for the praise she knew was coming.
"Your job was to apprehend the super-criminal, Iron Titan, before he could harm anymore civilians or damage additional property."
Like a cat, she stretched out in her chair and ran her clawed hands through her night-black hair. Her boss, O, head of the shadowy organization she worked for, was making her wait a little for the praise. Stating the obvious. Dragging things out. It was okay. She could wait.
"Yes sir," she nodded.
"Let's replay the video of what happened, shall we...?"
O pressed a button and part of the wall behind him pulled away to reveal a large flat screen.
"For brevity's sake I will play the video on double-speed."
Leona nodded again. Fine by her. After all, she was there, she knew what a great job she did, stopping the bad-guy, saving the day.
"Here we see Iron Titan stomping through the residential neighborhood. And here...Iron Titan knocks over a fence and invades what appears to be a birthday party for a young child."
Iron Titan was everything his name implied, a powerful, armored and lawless tank of a man. Bullets bounced off of him. People bounced off the pavement when they got in his way.
"And...here we are, you make your arrival, leaping out of a tree and onto his back, biting and clawing Iron Titan like, well, like a rabid cat. Though you are unable to penetrate his armor and truly harm him, Iron Titan is also unable to dislodge you, due to his marked lack of flexibility. He is also apparently unable to watch where he is going...and let us, see...first...he runs through one wall of the family's house...tears through another wall...now running down the street...that's 1 car he barrels into and destroys...now 2 more, that Volvo careens off the road to avoid him and hits the bus...ah yes, here is the part where you leap off his back, seize an errant power line and thrust it into his face, causing a city wide black-out..."
"Yeah, well, can't make an omelet without breaking some eggs, right?"
"Indeed. And all these untold millions in property damage would have been forgivable...but now you appear to be getting bribed by Iron Titan in exchange for the contents of a truck of...is it cat food? Which is one of the many vehicles he, shall we say, disabled during your tussle with him. Now, as Iron Titan stomps off down the road, you are in the middle of the road, eating catfood and apparently taking selfies. Suffice to say, you are not super agent material, you are fired and also under arrest. You will be placed either in prison or perhaps in an animal shelter, depending on the will of the court."
Leona rolled her eyes.
"Whatever, it was a boring job anyway."
Pulling a phone out of her leotard, she dialed a number.
"Yeah, those jokers just fired me. And guess what else...? They said your name should be the Iron Sissy or something. And that if you wanted to do something about it, you should head on over. Yeah, I think that's a great idea."
Suddenly, the Iron Titan blasts through the wall.
"WHO CALLED ME A SISSY?!?!?!?!"
Leona points towards her ex-boss and the turns around and saunters out of the room. Time for a new career...after all, cat-food doesn't pay for itself! Maybe its time to give professional wrestling a try...they don't have a problem with property damage, do they?
Leona Pantera licked her red lips while she waited for the praise she knew was coming.
"Your job was to apprehend the super-criminal, Iron Titan, before he could harm anymore civilians or damage additional property."
Like a cat, she stretched out in her chair and ran her clawed hands through her night-black hair. Her boss, O, head of the shadowy organization she worked for, was making her wait a little for the praise. Stating the obvious. Dragging things out. It was okay. She could wait.
"Yes sir," she nodded.
"Let's replay the video of what happened, shall we...?"
O pressed a button and part of the wall behind him pulled away to reveal a large flat screen.
"For brevity's sake I will play the video on double-speed."
Leona nodded again. Fine by her. After all, she was there, she knew what a great job she did, stopping the bad-guy, saving the day.
"Here we see Iron Titan stomping through the residential neighborhood. And here...Iron Titan knocks over a fence and invades what appears to be a birthday party for a young child."
Iron Titan was everything his name implied, a powerful, armored and lawless tank of a man. Bullets bounced off of him. People bounced off the pavement when they got in his way.
"And...here we are, you make your arrival, leaping out of a tree and onto his back, biting and clawing Iron Titan like, well, like a rabid cat. Though you are unable to penetrate his armor and truly harm him, Iron Titan is also unable to dislodge you, due to his marked lack of flexibility. He is also apparently unable to watch where he is going...and let us, see...first...he runs through one wall of the family's house...tears through another wall...now running down the street...that's 1 car he barrels into and destroys...now 2 more, that Volvo careens off the road to avoid him and hits the bus...ah yes, here is the part where you leap off his back, seize an errant power line and thrust it into his face, causing a city wide black-out..."
"Yeah, well, can't make an omelet without breaking some eggs, right?"
"Indeed. And all these untold millions in property damage would have been forgivable...but now you appear to be getting bribed by Iron Titan in exchange for the contents of a truck of...is it cat food? Which is one of the many vehicles he, shall we say, disabled during your tussle with him. Now, as Iron Titan stomps off down the road, you are in the middle of the road, eating catfood and apparently taking selfies. Suffice to say, you are not super agent material, you are fired and also under arrest. You will be placed either in prison or perhaps in an animal shelter, depending on the will of the court."
Leona rolled her eyes.
"Whatever, it was a boring job anyway."
Pulling a phone out of her leotard, she dialed a number.
"Yeah, those jokers just fired me. And guess what else...? They said your name should be the Iron Sissy or something. And that if you wanted to do something about it, you should head on over. Yeah, I think that's a great idea."
Suddenly, the Iron Titan blasts through the wall.
"WHO CALLED ME A SISSY?!?!?!?!"
Leona points towards her ex-boss and the turns around and saunters out of the room. Time for a new career...after all, cat-food doesn't pay for itself! Maybe its time to give professional wrestling a try...they don't have a problem with property damage, do they?