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Post by Johnny Reb on Jun 4, 2017 3:06:56 GMT
Johnny Reb is wiping off sweat in the locker room after his 'loss' to Slick Doctor. Wild Child massages his shoulders and whispers words of encouragement in his ears.
Wild Child: Babe, you outfought him, outsmarted him, out-toughed him. You won that one...if you didn't take your eyes off the ball to save me from that sicko's groping...
Johnny Reb: Don't worry about me, babe. Unlike the so-called Doctor, I don't drown my sorrows in beer and I don't cry over spilled milk. He wants to plant a kiss on you? Plant a kiss on my girl? That's fine, that's just more knuckles I have to plant on his kisser. Talking to me about blow up dolls and eating contests...what a joker. That man couldn't last a minute on my Paleo Diet...heck, I don't even think he has the brain cells to count carbs, calories and protein like I...no calculator, in my head.
Wild Child: I've seen you do it babe, it's impressive!
Johnny Reb: Eating contest? He doesn't have the discipline or the guts to down 8 chicken breast a day, no sauces, no nothing, just plain chicken breast...and I like it! So you stole a win from me...you can't steal these washboard abs...you can't steal my woman (Wild Child plants a sloppy kiss on Reb's lips and hops on his lap) and you sure as heck aren't ever, ever going to beat me again. Heck, I'm not even tired after that little dust up...babe, lets go see if they got any Crossfit gyms in town...I need to work up a real sweat...besides, you could use a break from me. Go hang out at the hotel or hit the clubs, remember how good you look, how much attention you get when you're not with ol' Reb.
Reb throws a towel over the camera man and things go to black.
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Post by Johnny Reb on May 27, 2017 6:22:08 GMT
Johnny Reb is at the gym, working up a sweat. he's bench-pressing one bikini-clad beauty in each had balancing their tushes carefully on his palms. Meanwhile, another girl in an old school 80's style leotard holds up a TV for him to watch while he does his reps. on the screen was footage of Slick Doctor's alcoholic escapades.
Johnny Reb: woman, i said i wanted you to put it on the news. if some loser wants to drown his sorrows in alcohol and hotwings that isn't news and it isn't my problem. that joke can abuse his body all he wants. maybe it will even get him ready for the abuse i heap on him in this joke of a tournament. its funny isn't it. the best moment of slick's life, the moment he will tell his grandkids about is going to be the time he got to share a ring with johnny reb. maybe i should really mess you up just so that you remember your brush with glory. i mean, with all that alcohol, your memory must be spotty. but hey, like i said before, its not really my problem. and i got work to do. where was i...?
101, 102...
johnny reb continues on with his workout...
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Post by Johnny Reb on May 18, 2017 7:05:36 GMT
johnny reb is walking down the streets in an open t-shirt showing off his muscular hairy chest while he runs a hand affectionately through his hair. women flock after him and caress him but he doesnt even give them a sideways glance, his eyes trained on the camera crew in front of him.
johnny reb: so i've got a lot to prove. i got into this fed under false premises. i'm not revolution...we look alike, yeah. and i used to look up to the guy, yeah. but i aint him. so i guess thats why even though im the only real wrestler in this whole federation, the only one that can enhance president leroy's brand and be the face of the company he worked so hard to build...even though i'm everything he wants and needs in a champ...i'm stuck here forced to work my way up in some tournament, chock-full of nobody's, from an undersized jobber who isn't only mute but also apparently so deformed in the face he hides behind a power rangers mask...to a pencil-armed alcohol swilling hobo...all the way to, well, Ukyo and Basho...the nuclear night wings...they're alright. i wish em luck, even. but the fact is i get that i'm starting on the bottom. and thats no problem because i'm also the only one in this fed who is actually willing and able to put in work. i like challenges...and just the challenge of how many twinkies you can stuff down in a minute like big dusty haystacks...i mean pushing this body of mine to its limits. i mean turning on the pressure, looking into the face of danger, risking everything and seeing what i'm made of. that's what i live for and that's what makes me different.
i'm not afraid to face my fears. i'm not even afraid of the two main eventers for our next show, big dusty haystacks and madman. and those are two scary, scary men. i mean, i'll be honest, i'd hate to get into the ring or on the mat with madman. i'll do it any time any place but i'm definitely scared.
the women around johnny reb look confused and troubled. they attempt to caress and nuzzle him to reassure their idol.
johnny reb: i mean, getting in the ring with you, madman, is risking certain death or at least a trip to the hospital. nobody can argue that. even locking up with you at all is skirting with danger. but hey, president leroy has the best med staff in the world and i know that if they can't get rid of all the mrsa, staph infection, ring worm, contact herpes, fleas and general stench that im gonna probably walk away with after i beat you into a little stain on the ground, well then nobody can. but i got faith in the wwl med staff. heck, i'll probably have to wear hazmat suit or at least some long sleeves and i know the ladies won't like that but what you gonna do. i might even give you an extra beatdown just for all those showers you skipped, loser.
now big dusty haystacks...that man, i see him in my nightmares. in fact, he's the only guy i ever do have nightmares of. because you know, if i ever lost my drive, my heart...my will to be more than just a sentient pile of cellulite...well, i might be a little bit like big dusty haystacks. the man is a walking cautionary tale. ice cream tastes good children, but only a few scoops at a time. heck, i think that's why the president even has you in this federation, tubby. you're one giant public service announcement to all the children out there to put down the sweets and hit the gym. but you know after i drop you on your head a time or ten before i finally pin you for the 1-2-3 you're gonna be even better...i mean, one looked at your beaten down body and kids will never skip gym class again big dusty ol' mate.
all this has me thinking...ol reb isn't scheduled for the main event but i might just give people their money's worth anyway.
johnny reb winks at the camera.
johnny reb: boys, i might be seeing you sooner than you think.
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Post by Johnny Reb on May 14, 2017 3:10:21 GMT
I call you my next victim boy. Enjoy your hot wings from a hospital bed!
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Post by Johnny Reb on May 14, 2017 3:08:19 GMT
His perfect, curly blonde hair dripping sweat, the man known as Johnny Revolution slumps against the pull-down machine after yet another hellacious yet. A pony-tailed woman in a thong leotard carefully wipes his shirtless back while another, a brunette in yoga pants and a work-out bra, hurriedly fetches him a drink of water. He looks up and notices the WWL camera crew, headed up by an attractive young Hispanic woman in a tight fitting business suit which reveals nearly as much of her curvy physique as the women currently attending to the blonde man.
"What took you so long...? Of all the Warrior Wrestling League, nobody's made a bigger splash than me in the last battle royal. Madman hid behind Rogar, Wild Child just straight up hid and KnightMask was unconscious for most of it...meanwhile, I kicked butt and took names with the only team I ever needed...my two fists. But this whole week, while I've been hitting the gym and the mat...I haven't heard a word, not a peep from you so-called wrestling press. Maybe you guys got confused and looked for me in all the local hospitals...or maybe in the insane asylum that our so-called champion probably rents out a room at? Maybe you just didn't get that, instead of screwing around pretending to be Batman--I'm looking at you KnightMask, you mute idiot--instead of licking my wounds like a fat invalid...I'd be doing what a real wrestler does...hitting the gym, pumping the iron and making myself into an even more perfect weapon than I already am."
Selena Cruz found herself gawking as he flexed his pectorials rhythmically, only vaguely noticing his lips curl into a smirk.
"I know that's hard for you to believe Selena, but you ain't seen the best of me. Its really going to stretch your imagination, but I can get even better babe."
Gathering herself with a gulp, Selena looked down at her question sheet, fumbling nervously.
"Now, what I wanted to ask you was, erm..."
Gently, the rugged blonde wrestler hushes the woman.
"Selena, this not my time...this is your time, babe. You've worked hard, you've gone to journalism school and now your moment is hear. You're standing , just inches away from greatness...here you are, looking at the future of wrestling. This is the greatest moment in your life...enjoy it, soak it in. Don't waste it asking silly questions. I want you to enjoy this moment, because unless you do something about that birthmark and your posture...this might be the closest you ever get to me...Johnny Reb.
That's right. You heard correct. Johnny Reb. I don't know where Johnny Revolution is and I don't care. I used his name to get into the Warrior Wrestling League and get signed and now I'm going to take that name and toss it in the trash where UWL has-beens like Madman, Rogar and yes, Slick Doctor...that beer-swilling piece of crap belong. My legacy...my win streak...my march to the top begins here and now. Or it will...as soon as you take your camera crew and your hungry brown eyes and get out of here so I can get back to work. Or better yet, grab some work out clothes and hit the gym yourself....then maybe you'll be able to do more than just dream about me for the rest of your life, Selena.
As for the WWL...well, I'm going to trash each and everyone of you eventually...but I may as well start with Slick Doctor, assuming his alcoholism doesn't kill his worthless hide before he can find his way to the ring.
TIME FOR A REBELLION!"
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Post by Johnny Reb on Apr 28, 2017 10:14:51 GMT
(The crowd boos and throws tomatos, pop cans and other debris into the ring as Athena Fury engages in a lackluster match against a Warrior Wrestling Leaguge jobber. Then the monitor flashes away from the monotonous facade of the match, to the gritty streets of Chicago. A familiar voice booms, "ITS TIME FOR A REVOLUTION!" as the crowd is brought to its feet. Standing on a rooftop in the windy city is Revolution himself, undaunted by the cold, his musculare chest bare, wearing only jeans and wrestling boots.
Athena Fury catches one the tomatos hurled his way by the crowd and chucks it at the big screen. She then turns to her "jobber" opponent, who boots her in the stomach and lays her flat with the Pains of Revolution.
Fake skin and a wig are thrown to the canvas, as Johnny Revolution stands triumphant in the ring once more.)
Johnny Revolution: That’s right wrestling fans. Old Rev was brought out of retirement once again to bring a federation to glory. How can you have a great wrestling fed without me? I am simply the best in the world. Any of you wanna-be wrestling jokes think you can beat me Johnny Revolution? Well step in the ring and we will see. Its time for a revolution!!!
{Fades to black}
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